This morning I threw up fire.
Most people probably hope that their child comes into this world without any genetic deformities. I was talking to a friend over dinner about the topic of children, and she said that she wants her child to be smart, too. At first I agreed. I would love if I had an intelligent child who could function and use logic to solve problems.
After dinner in a late night class, we got our exam grades back. I did worse than the class average. And then I realized that the material just does not come naturally to me. I am going to continue to study, but I am just never going to be a good test taker in this subject. And that’s when I came to the conclusion, that if my child does not have ambition, or does not do too well in his or her classes, that I am not going to hold it against him or her. I sincerely try to do well, but it just does not materialize. If my child is the same way, how can I judge them based off of that? I can’t.
It’s the next day. And I have to get to class. But when every day is a struggle to survive, it’s a challenge to get out of bed. I managed to get ready, but before I got through the door I accidentally ran into my table. The collision broke the skin on my leg and I dropped to the ground. I was late to class by fifteen minutes because I spent fifteen minutes on that floor wondering if life was worth living.
When I arrived, the professor was handing out exams. My exam is always one of the last ones to be handed out because I am always one of the first people to hand it in. I don’t speed through my exams purposely, but I am just a fast test taker. And over the years I’ve learned not to double check my answers because without fail I will wind up changing correct answers into incorrect answers.
The girl next to me got her exam back, and she got a 91. I was like, wow that’s so good. But as I looked at the first page of her test, I could see that she put different answers for a few questions than I did and she had no marks indicating incorrect answers, so I began to realize that I was going to receive another less than average exam grade. Except that this time I didn’t. I got a perfect 100. It turns out that the professor did not mark the incorrect answers on this particular quiz.
That class is entrepreneurship, and we have a project coming up in two weeks where we have to hand in a business plan that will account for 40% of our grade. We’re supposed to really try to convince an investor to invest into our company. And the only way to do that is to guarantee soaring profits. But you know, my dream was never to be filthy rich. So I am not going to do my project like that.
Instead I am going to create a business that is a service to the people. It’s going to connect suicidal Americans with Swiss doctors. Because, you know over there in Switzerland that they have an entirely different set of morals based on death. They believe that you should ultimately be able to decide when and how you die. The issue has gone to court, and the votes remain in favor for both assisted suicide, and suicide tourists. The service only caters to a few hundred people a year, so I am going to have to figure out how to spin this into a profitable organization. I don’t even want it to be “profitable.” I just want it to be sustainable. It’s going to be great to hand in an assignment about a business that allows people to die painlessly in peace in an environment where deciding to end your life is not frowned upon.
